I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
