Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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