i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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