I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
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