Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.

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(440): View more from Ohio

wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant

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(703): View more from Virginia

I can feel you judging me through the phone.

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(660): View more from Missouri

I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(304): View more from West Virginia

He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.

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(347): View more from New York

I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE

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