I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Randomize
