oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
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