My Higher Power is John Stamos
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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