I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
