When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
