So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
