if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
