Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Randomize
