If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
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You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Mom said you looked used
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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