Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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