The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Randomize
