I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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