I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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