I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
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