Texts From Last Night

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  (312): View more from Illinois

  I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr

  (269): View more from Michigan

  Wat???

  (312): View more from Illinois

  U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender

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  (312): I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr (269): Wat??? (312): U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender http://tfl.nu/fak1
  Replies (4) Good night (1165) Bad night (1096)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?

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  (513): the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts? http://tfl.nu/aqwb
  Replies (55) Good night (2466) Bad night (1459)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.

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  (503): what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed. http://tfl.nu/lo29
  Replies (28) Good night (3201) Bad night (717)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  I showed him my bush... on skype.

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  (817): I showed him my bush... on skype. http://tfl.nu/384w
  Replies (40) Good night (927) Bad night (4255)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.

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  (530): you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts. http://tfl.nu/kee8
  Replies (27) Good night (5183) Bad night (2512)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.

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  (601): A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first. http://tfl.nu/xh2t
  Replies (18) Good night (4656) Bad night (1372)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget

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  (916): i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget http://tfl.nu/82uy
  Replies (7) Good night (4116) Bad night (1114)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?

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  (315): I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic? http://tfl.nu/satp
  Replies (23) Good night (4358) Bad night (1241)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.

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  (214): Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing. http://tfl.nu/4y7p
  Replies (9) Good night (6246) Bad night (1365)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines

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  (603): Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines http://tfl.nu/hhep
  Replies (26) Good night (3960) Bad night (1069)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.

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  (443): Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion. http://tfl.nu/xb4s
  Replies (7) Good night (1240) Bad night (2582)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.

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  (727): Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best. http://tfl.nu/j1qb
  Replies (3) Good night (1084) Bad night (386)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?

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  (630): so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!? http://tfl.nu/j27z
  Replies (2) Good night (387) Bad night (622)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.

  (1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

  ....you got kicked INTO a party??

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  (306): so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay. (1-306): ....you got kicked INTO a party?? http://tfl.nu/nppd
  Replies (2) Good night (933) Bad night (335)
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."

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  (219): My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this." http://tfl.nu/i86y
  Replies (2) Good night (515) Bad night (149)

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