My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Randomize
