like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
How external is "for external use only"?
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
