you should give me head with plastic fangs in
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
