Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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