Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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