at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
