what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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