found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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