Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
