Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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