Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
