I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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