I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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