Are we in a gay sports bar?
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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