Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
