So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Randomize
