Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
