My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
