So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
