lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Randomize
