Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
