Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
