You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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