Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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