i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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