And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
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It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
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Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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