All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize