I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
