I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize