we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
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Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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